Happiness Matters

When I went with my mother to the burning ghat and saw the familiar faces around her who had come to pay their last respects before she was cremated, one question that I had in my mind was why not a single person from her clan (be it her own blood-related family or her friends) came?  All the people who were standing there were the ones who were related to my father by blood or the ones who were connected with my father's family. As days passed, I introspected her life.  When I asked myself - "Where are her people?" "You are her people. You, your father, and your brother are all that she had!"  I could clearly see through now - how gradually she distanced herself from her friends, deprioritized her own relatives, and stopped attending her own family functions just because either my brother or I had an exam or my father had to travel for work or for his own relatives' well-being. Gradually, my mother succumbed to the idea, like millions of other married women...

Once I came across an interview with SRK where he said, "Do not feel guilty about making money as long as you are making it with your own hard work and not robbing people. Don't be apologetic about buying expensive things or owning things with your own hard-earned money. It is very important to fulfill all worldly desires, to possess things that can be bought with money—that's what you are working day in and day out for!" Well, I agree with him. Especially coming from a middle-class background where we were told to study hard to live a better life in the future—as one of the kids of the '90s who have sacrificed TV programs, family get-togethers, or going out with friends to a movie—we all did only one thing in our childhood days: we studied. That was the only thing we knew to free ourselves from boring, simple lives. We all wanted to go out, watch movies, drink cold drinks, eat chips, have ice cream whenever and wherever we wanted to. We all aspired to be like the...

Dear Readers, It's been a while since I wrote a blog! Thank you for pinging me and actually reminding me to write again.  So many things are going on currently in my life - one of which is that I am penning down my next book! Yes!! I have finally started writing another book!!!  Generally, I shut myself down from everything else to write. Book writing is a journey in itself; it teaches me, helps me evolve, and it definitely brings emotional changes!  During this journey of personal evolution, I realized something. Often, we hear about or see people around us, or we ourselves often feel the need to be loved, to be noticed, to be valued, or to be an important part of someone else's life. What if we stop feeling that and instead feel we are enough for ourselves?  Was the theory too difficult to grasp?!  Let me simplify with my personal experience.  I used to wonder from my childhood days why I wasn't a boy, and then my parents might not have opted for a second...

Gold prices have witnessed all-time highs and FD rates are at an all-time low - where to invest now for sure-shot high returns? Here are a few places where you can safely keep your money: 1. PPF - Public Provident Fund : This is a tax-free investment, and you may invest up to ₹1.5 lakh per year. However, this is a long-term investment with a lock-in period of 15 years. 2. VPF - Voluntary Provident Fund : You may avail of this fund from your company by requesting the HR to share the VPF form with you. Again, this is a long-term investment, and the money goes into your PF account. (Have you read your salary slip? Then you would know what your current PF contribution is!) By availing VPF, you will be increasing your PF contribution. You may invest up to 10% of your basic salary in VPF. 3. KVP - Kisan Vikas Patra : This is a sure-shot formula to double your money in 9 years and 7 months, as this Indian Post Office savings scheme compounds your wealth. In the world of SIPs and shares, 9 yea...

Love is in holding hands, looking into eyes, Love is in smiling at each other, through the eyes, Love is in the last bench of school, while sharing tiffin full, Love is in cafes while bunking classes, Or is in library amidst books and thinking about full moon, Love is while walking beside the lake with a bunch of roses in red, Love is being together while talking unlimited! Love is not what you get, in 10 mins delivery for a sake, Love is not cakes, flowers, chocolates or teddy, Love is not in spending money, without spending time, Love is good to see in hit movies or in romantic novels, Love is not in Valentine day Advertisements, Love is all about showing you care and not telling you do!!!

 Dear Readers, Have you ever felt insecure at any point of time? You must be laughing at my question thinking isn't feeling insecure the most common thing! Well it is. As a child my biggest insecurity was my gender. I always wanted to be a boy, I despised the fact that God has made me a girl. My thoughts started from the day when my father bought a bicycle for my younger brother - the cycle which I wanted to ride! When I asked my parents why I was never given a cycle, their reply was you are a girl, you are delicate, what if while cycling you fall and get bruises or if major injury happens! From that day I started noticing this issue - the issue of being a "girl". Several times I had heard my relatives telling my parents - "Thank God you have been blessed with a son, else who would have looked after you in your old age or who would have carried forward your family!"  As a child I kept on exploring this zone and asked myself several times what is the thing which ...

Dear Readers, It's been quite sometime that I have not been able to blog. There were too many things going on - workfront, my Mom's health not keeping well etc. Now that all these are sorted, thought of resuming my blogging again. Just few days ago, when my maid asked me for a glass of water, I was looking for the designated glass which I usually give her and others who help us in our daily household work. Just then I realised something - I am unknowingly following the same norm which I have seen in my childhood days at home. I have seen my Mom, my Grandmom using separate dishes and glasses for the maids. For the guests of the house, seperate kind of crockery set was used but the difference between the dishes for maid and for the guests was the quality of the plates. The guests were given higher quality material plates, the family would use the basic material plates (steel at that time) and the maids would get aluminium or old steel plates. I immediately stopped searching for m...

 Life is in general very boring till you have something to look forward to. I remember in my childhood days, I would wait for the clock to strike 4PM as it was my time to go outside my house and play, after few years as I entered high school, I would look forward for the 5:30PM time as it was my cartoon watching time. Few years later, when I was in class 10, I would look forward for the 12noon Sundays as it was the only time of the entire week when I would watch TV, it was my time to watch Shaktimaan and eat my Sunday lunch - chicken curry & rice.  Those were the days when I would look forward, would really want the time to move forward fast so that I could do the things which I want to do. Over the years this list of "looking forward to things" have changed. But the only constant thing is - I still want the time to move forward. Being a child I mostly wanted to grow up so that nobody could tell me to study for the upcoming exams. I wanted to grow up to buy packets of Lay...

 MAA word ta banglatei jokon lekhatao banglatei hok! Golpo holeo sottyi - 1 Dining table bose khachhe sobai. Piu: Ma, ajk tumi ranya korecho? Ma: Ki kore bujli? Piu: Chicken tae doi die tumie banao tai..ki darun hoece! Kichukkn pore... Ma: Amr pet ta kmn byatha korce, gas hoece mone hoe. Ei chicken ta tui kheye ne plz purota. Ami r parchina. Baba: Seki, tumi to sudu dal diei vat kele, chicken ta to ektuo kelena! Ma: Ektu niramise khai, aj gas ta hoece mone hochhe. Piu: Amake puro ta die nije na khabar ovyas ta kobe je jabe tomar?! Ma: Sotyie gas hoece amr re! Baba: Ghorei daktar ekn, kichhu hobena khaoto! Piu: Ha, keye nao, ami osud die debo. Ma: Na re khabona jor korisna. Piu: Achha besh khachhi ami purota. Ma arale muchki hasi hese Piu er muker hangla vora hasita deke mone mone bollo - " Eibar amr chicken khaoa holo!" Golpo holeo sottyi - 2 Ting tong! Kokn thke bell bajachhi kulchona kno, saradin ki je koro barite sudu to bosei thako, ektu dorja kulte gie eto late kno je ko...

Dear Working Mothers & Wives, How many times have you faced the dilemma of completing an urgent report on time vs feeding your child till her tummy is full? What to choose - a quality time with my child vs office parties? Now, my question is why cannot we have everything? Why can't I have it all? As a person I want to excel in my career, maintain good rapport with my work colleagues at the same time I want to witness and be there at every growing stage of my child. Why is the situation either or and not and? Again, another question that pops up is why don't the fathers face this dilemma? The answer is simple- they have already chosen their 100% dedication towards their work life as they feel by default it is the mother who would be the primary caregiver for the child who has been created by both. And, fathers are not to be blamed. You know why? Because just like our society has labelled mothers to be the primary caregiver for the child, it has also labelled fathers as the m...

Dear Readers, Did the title shock you? Isnt it the most common word that you get to hear if you are living in West Bengal? Good bad or ugly, in happiness or out of frustration you will hear - "Pagol naki?!"(Which means - Are you mad?) While they might not be asking about your mental health literally but yes they would suspect somthing is not working properly in your brain. Bengalis have always been focussed on gaining intelligence and not wealth. No wonder why we have produced so many scientists, literary veterans and not so many businessmen! Anyways, coming back to the topic of mental health we see so many cases of frustrations, anger, depression ( several kinds of depression including post partum depression). The starting point of these cases would be lack of clear goal in life and the ending point would be feeling bad about the kind of behaviour that you get from others. I will state few examples for better clarity. Example 1: I dont know how to use my free time as I think...

  Dear Readers, It's been long time. I couldnt write blog as I was shifting from Mumbai. And, yes I am back to Kolkata after 5 long years! Initially, I was apprehensive about the shift because of many reasons. I was not sure if we would be getting the same facilities like those in Mumbai. Not only lifestyle and availability of things, several things are different here - medical facilities, education system, people & their thought process. But today when I see my daughter is playing happily with my parents who have so many grey hairs, wrinkled skin - I feel this shift was the need of the hour. After returning back I suddenly felt how much old my parents have grown and how much sense of security or strength they get after seeing me living close by in the same city. I never understood their thought process till I became a parent myself. When I think about my future now I foresee doing things together with my daughter, I want to live close to her not because I want to control he...

 Dear Readers, Most of you who are reading this blog know how addicted I am to Facebook! I wrote in my debut novel "That COVID Episode" how I plan my entire life around social media like Instagram and Facebook. After posting each and every minute detail of my life on Facebook, I reached a stage which I call "Saturation Stage"- the stage where Facebook became as indispensable as oxygen and the result was obviously not very positive. Like my father says, "Too much of anything is not good".  I decided to cut off myself from the Facebook world and let's see what happens. Initially, after the cut off I started spending more time on other social media like Instagram and LinkedIn. I found there's a crowd out there who did exactly what I had done - they stopped existing from Facebook. Previously I had the impression that Facebook is as good as your Aadhar Card, no Facebook means you are no more in this world!!! After spending considerable time on Insta ...

  Ami co-ed school e pori. Amr class e 30ta chele 25ta meye. Amra sobai ekirkm benche bose eki sirer class kori. Colleger prothom din bari thke beruchi notun utsaho nie je eto students der beat kore eto valo college chance peyeci. Tokon suni amr ek parar kakima hak pere amr ma k bolce - Meye to college uthe gelo, eibar aste aste bier deka sona suru kore din didi. Odike deklm amri college chance paoa arekti chele jokon bari thke beruchhe tokon take sobai bolce - Ki valo college peyechs baba, ma babar muk ujjol korle. Mone elo - Why so? Pore ami school thke jkn engineering e college jai deki sekane chele 30tai ache, kintu meye matro 12ta. Mone elo - Why so? Campus interview te prothom company tei amr hoe gelo ar sei cheletir holona. Sunlm parar kakima bolce - Company ra meyeder k prefer kore besi. Ki ar krbi baba chesta kore ja. Ar amr jnyo uni ma ke bollen - Eibar dekasona suru kre din didi. Meyer boyos hochhe. Ami masters korbo sune kakimar to gale hat - seki eto valo chakri chere ...

 "If money is the power, then I want it now!" Does this echo your thought? Then please read it till the end. At the end of the day, we all want to have financial stability, specially after Covid Episode when entire economy is disrupted, financial stability is the only thing that we seek for. In my last blog " Where to invest during Covid" I gave an exhaustive list of investment possibilities. Current FD (Fixed Deposit) rate is 5% to 5.4% and average annual inflation rate (1958 to 2021) is 7.29%. What does this mean? This means what we get for Rs 100 now, we would be getting the same quantity at Rs 107 after 1 year, while if we invest Rs 100 now in FD, after one year it would be Rs 105. This means FD is no more an investment now, as you can see we would be losing money if we go for FD. Apart from investing in share markets, you may go for Bond market. The risks are far less in Bond as if a company gets bankrupted, then their shareholders might not get back what they ...

1. Aj saptami, tai ami sari pore zoom call e ofycer meeting attend krchi. Client amk dekhe toh obak. Jiges korlo - Why so decked up? Today is Durga Puja. Oh yes, we have heard about it. Your Autumn festival! It is known as world's largest outdoor art festival. Kotha ta bolar somoe proudly bollm kintu mone mone oder k bolcilm  Nikuchi koreche toder meeting! Esob faltu kotha bondo korto, barite to jete parchina, at least internet e dekte to de pujota! Bari chara ami bohu bochor. Sob probashi bangalir moton amio January mas porlei flight er ticket dekte thaki. Coronar kripae ebochor sesber pat nei, tai nijei banie fellm luchi aloor dom. Client call sarte sarte khachhi ar ki. Luchita thik gol hoeni, kintu tele moida poreche toh, sathe mute kore dhakider dhak bajano dekchi kolkatar pandaler samner - mondo lagchena! Pujo pujo byaparta pachhi jeno. 2. Amr bari Bardhamane, chakri sutre thaki Banglar baire. Jotoi bolina keno bangla ta amr thik asena, sari ta backdated,bochor e pujor ei ding...

The time is difficult for us all. Hence, investing money in the right places is what we need to do to safeguard ourselves from further damage. With interest rates down, now FD is no longer 'the' option for future investment. So, here are few things which we may do with our money if we are lucky enough to have a job till now (during this Covid time, so many people lost their jobs!): 1. If you are a risk-averse person like me, try out the traditional investments like - a.  VPF (Voluntary Provident Fund) - Where you may contribute up to 100% of your basic and DA, with a lock-in period of 5 years and interest rate is same as EPF. b. PPF (Public Provident Fund) - Among the conventional methods, this one has the highest interest rate after PF, however, it is for the long term - 15 years!!!!! c. NPS (National Pension Scheme) - Here you may select the investment percentage more in bond to safeguard your money. However the flip side is you have to buy an annuity on maturity, you won...

 Krishanur ping deke Mayurakkir anondo dorena. Sei kobe theke tinder e cheleta k follow krce, eto mas pore cheleta sudu je or request accept korece tai na, ok dateo dakche. Mayurakki to bondhu mohole wats app gruper madyame khoborta panchkan korlo. Etto handsome chele jodi date dake sei khoborta ki chepe raka jae. Nana bondur nanan advice - kon dress porbe, kivabe sajbe ityadi ityadi. Oneke je hingse korcena erkmo na. Mayurakki seta bes upovog korce, hingse na korle ar sobai k janie moja ta ki kre hbe. Joluk ora - Mayurakki vabe. Jak ge seje guje seto gelo Krishanur bari, coronar jnyo baire ar kthae jbe, tai baritei dekeche. Mayurakki vabe valoi holo, ei sujoge or ma babar sathe alap tao sara jbe. Doorbell bajatei sathe sathe dorja kullo, jeno odhir agrohe opekka krcilo. Jothakrome golpo suru hlo, onk interest nie Mayur er byapare khutinati prosno krlo Krish. Olpokkoner modyaei kokn je ora oder valo nam chere eke opor k Mayur ar Krish ble dakte laglo seta nijerai keyal krlona. Dinn...

Dear Readers, During pregnancy, we didnt stop going out on dates. Mental happiness of the mother is the most important for a healthy baby. We focussed on that mainly.  We went out to movie dates mostly as eating out was limited option for me.Once we booked a 4d movie and when we reached there came to know that pregnant women are not allowed in a 4d hall. Phew!!! This is what happens when you are young and excited parents! I remember in my 3rd trimester once we went to Pizza Hut to satiate my pizza craving, found a couple whispering at my baby bump and yes from their expression you could clearly guess that they were wondering how come I went out with that huge baby bump of mine! I felt amused. This might be because with age I have become immune to "log kya kehenge" - I have learnt to ignore what people think. This has helped me a lot in staying positive and also in my self growth and happiness. Whenever my baby moved inside me or responded to my touch I felt happy and good tha...

Dear Readers, "Motherhood is a different ballgame altogether!" Whenever my mother watsapps me or calls me, she asks - Did you eat? Probably this is the universal question of all mothers. And like all other children I get irritated by this question. I used to wonder all these years why is she after my food intake. Another equally irritating behaviour of her is hypertension. Now that I stay miles apart from her, phone and wats app are the medium of contact. If I do not answer her calls or if the last seen of my wats app is several hours ago she starts panicking. I wonder why is she like this when it comes to me. Because otherwise she is a very cool headed person. Ironically today I am equally uncool, hypertensed, all time freaking out mother just like my own Mom who's only motive in life is to feed her daughter properly and who always finds her daughter to be thin each time she sees her! Lol! I am aware that I have this problem but I dont wanna solve it. Strange?! Isnt it? ...