Pregnancy - Overhyped

Dear Diary,

"Pregnancy is over hyped but motherhood is not"

By the word "over hyped" I mean once you are pregnant so much thought and panic is created by the people around you that at the end of the day you also tend to think only about pregnancy all the day.

Thankfully, I didnt indulge myself in this overthinking process. For me pregnancy for a woman is a natural process just like physical changes for a girl when she enters her teenage life. So, I continued the normal activities in my entire pregnancy period starting from doing all household chores to attending office physically. Since covid episode and lock-down started in my 3rd trimester and there was no maid in the house, I did clean utensils and did cook. In pregnancy you are not supposed to lift heavy weight or bend and pick things from floor - I followed these. The thing which kept me physically active till my delivery time was exercise and walk- every day I used to walk (of course slow walk) for 1hour and I used to do 30minutes of exercise (suggested by my physiotherapist) which included aerobics and breathing exercises as well.

Many people suggested that I should take leave at least in my last month of pregnancy. But I worked till the day I got admitted to hospital which was one day prior to my delivery. This is because I wanted to stay active mentally as well.

During this entire 10months I realized pregnancy is actually very normal if you think so. It's all in the mind. For generations women have created hype around it may be because this is the only time when women get most attention and care in the family and yes of course they do enjoy this specially when for rest of the life women have been treated as second class citizen. Another reason can be child birth is the area of expertise for a woman. There was a time when a woman stayed home and a man would go outside home to earn. Due to exposure to outside world men would discuss about politics, economics - the things which affect life at macro level. Women with no exposure would not be able to participate in these discussions. Their area of expertise lay in household chores which were perceived to be of lesser or no importance. The only thing that was considered to be important was child birth and who knows about it better than a woman! Hence they would put their entire energy, thought process in this period of 10months and would create a hype around it. This has been passed through generations. Hence it is not rare these days to find pregnant women taking break from career during pregnancy or once conceived women leaving their career.

And because of these examples set by the ladies when I was pregnant and was attending office I used to face questions and statements like - why are you still working, why are you coming to office, will you take a break in career, focus on your pregnancy and don't think about work. I used to wonder what do they mean when they say focus on your pregnancy. Am I supposed to sit at one place look at my baby bump and think only about the baby for 24hours? Why can't we manage both? Did'nt we sit for joint entrance in the year we passed HS (board exam)? Even my husband is pregnant and nobody is telling him to take a break in his career just because he unable to carry our child inside him!

It is perceived that pregnancy makes you weak. It's a myth. The truth is because of your physical changes in pregnancy you may become physically weak but this power of carrying your baby makes you stronger than ever, mentally - if you do not listen to the panic that people around you create unknowingly.

It is said whatever you intake, it passes down to your baby in the womb - intake includes both food and thoughts. Being active physically and mentally helped me in my delivery. While I continued my normal routine, I followed the below guidelines which helped me to sail smoothly through pre delivery days:

1. Drink lots of water - specially in 3rd trimester. Most of the premature cases happen because of fall in the water level.

2. Walking and exercise is a must for healthy baby and healthy mom.

3. Listen to music and interact with you baby- I used to listen to music while walking. You may keep your palm and rub a little on your baby bump and talk with your little one. You would be amazed to see how our baby reacts to your hand movement. Talking helps your child to think. All these help in the brain development of the child.

4. Eat in small quantity at regular intervals. I was hospitalized in my first trimester because of severe vomiting ( common phenomenon in pregnancy). Hence I would eat every 2 hours throughout the day (except for the night).

5. Things to be included in diet - leafy vegetables, green vegetables, fruits, sprouts, nuts, milk and milk products, egg, fish, lean meat (specially for mutton), chicken and omega 3 fatty acid for brain development of the child (prawns, walnut contain these). Oily food, excess ghee, excess butter, cold drink, coffee should be avoided. In last trimester sugar intake level is to be reduced as this causes gestational diabetes. One egg and 1/2 litre of milk should be included in diet everyday. Only thing to be avoided throughout your pregnancy period is raw papaya.

6. Read and stay active mentally. You may watch good movies, all time good books (not necessarily religious books). Make your own brain work more these days.

7. Do not panic or overthink about pregnancy. It is a power that women have - to carry the child in their womb but you are not the only one who has become pregnant. Evidence is world's population. So relax!

8. Involve and allow your husband to contribute and participate in the entire pregnancy period. Let him find out diet for you, list of books and movies for you; allow him to interact with baby. And yes let him understand your mood swings (which would happen because of hormonal changes)!

9. Enjoy your 10months of cheat days. This is the only time when you can eat to your heart's content without the fear of getting fat as now you are supposed to increase your body weight 1kg/ 15 days.

10. Have a separate wardrobe for this period. You cannot wear tight fitting jeans. I used to wear gowns.

Last but not the least no need to feel down as you look into the mirror just because now you look different than your usual self. You would regain your older self post delivery. So relax and chill!

Loads of love,

Twisa

P.S - I miss my cheat days!

And yes, I was working from home from my 8th month of pregnancy because of lockdown. Otherwise I would have taken work from home from my 9th month!